God’s Plan For The Family
Family – December 2023 – Grace & Truth Magazine
God’s Plan For The Family
God Invented The Family
The family was God’s idea. He created a couple, Adam and Eve, and told them to have children (Gen. 1:27-28). It was His intention, and “recent brain and medical research has revealed [that] children should be raised in stable homes.”1 Nuclear households bring “benefits” to children.*
Single Parenthood Is Not God’s Plan
Studies report, “Single parenthood … prevails in nearly a third of all families in the United States”* and note, “Kids generally don’t fare so well in the instability that is likely to ensue.”* It is also noteworthy that “children who experience the death of a parent … are better off than those who weather ruptured adult relationships.”* God knows this and said, “I hate divorce” (Mal. 2:16 NASB).
Pseudo-families
Contrary to God’s plan, man has created so-called families through same-sex marriages. God called these relationships an “abomination” (Lev. 18:22 ESV). He said they receive “in themselves the due penalty for their error” (Rom. 1:26-27). Such couples cannot have children together naturally, so they obtain them through adoption or other means.
Children in such relationships who turn out well do not indicate that He accepts such families. Rather, these children bear witness to God’s grace operating for them.
Remarriage And Stepchildren
A single parent who has lost a mate is likely to marry again and form a two-parent family. When there are children from a prior marriage, there will be stepparents. The children in these families generally thrive when both parents accept and love them, and when the children love and accept their stepparents.
We have an example of the proper functioning of a stepparent in the willing acceptance by Joseph of the role of stepfather (Mt. 1:18-25, 2:13-14; Lk. 2:41-42). Also, we see the proper behavior of a stepchild in our Lord Jesus: He was “submissive” to Joseph, His stepfather, as well as to His mother (v.51).
Unwanted Children
Children should never be unwanted! We believers know that whatever happens is never by chance but is allowed by God. When a new child might be considered as “unwanted” before he or she is born, the prospective parents should accept the baby as being from the Lord. They should adopt Mary’s attitude and say as she did to the angel who appeared to her, “Behold I am the servant of the Lord; let it be, according to your word” (1:38)
When a new child is added to a family, he or she should be cherished and treated with love. Even though they may hardly be able to provide for the children they already have, after a new child is born, they should never part with it!
Barren Couples And The Family
In spite of all our scientific knowledge about conception, there are still barren couples. What can be God’s purpose in their barrenness? Perhaps God intends for them to have a family by adopting children who would otherwise be aborted. Maybe He desires the couples to adopt needy boys and girls and “bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4). This is a most difficult work – not always filled with joy. Only those believers whom the Lord has called to do this work should undertake it, and then it should be done in full dependence on Him, for the help needed and satisfaction in it. The Lord can use many more couples in this way, but few have the needed faith.
Children Are A Reward
Scripture tells us, “Children are an inheritance from Jehovah, the fruit of the womb a reward” (Ps. 127:3 JND). This is true not only of natural-born children but also of adopted or foster children. However, parenthood is a tremendous responsibility. Parents who bring their children up in the Lord will “greatly rejoice” and “be glad” (Prov. 23:24-25 ESV). Failing to follow the Lord’s teaching, whether by parent or child, will bring “grief” to the father and “bitterness” to the mother (17:25).
It is God’s plan that joy and happiness be ours by following His plan for the family!
ENDNOTE
* Bazelon, E. The Atlantic, Dec. 2014, pp. 54-55). This reference is cited to give Emily Bazelon credit for the useful, true statements quoted from her article, but not to endorse comments made on other points.
By Alan H. Crosby